Hi Darren Rose here, we would like to introduce our readers to a new segment we are adding to our site. The segment is called “10 Questions with…” From time to time we will bring on different entrepreneurs and public figures to answer 10 quick questions so you guys can get to know them and what they are all about. For our first segment we welcome the owner of relationship and dating site Blackcelibacy.com Mr. Jeremy Billingsley.
How did the idea for BlackCelibacy.com?
The idea of BlackCelibacy.com came to me over four years ago during a Sunday morning church service on “Lust and Fornication”. The church was a small church but big on having ministries outside of church and they were heavily involved in the community. That Sunday the message was mainly directed towards the singles and I was really moved by the pastor’s passionate effort to deliver the message. During the service I remember looking around at the singles and feeling that they were taking in the message. I thought to myself that, outside of the church there are not many places where singles can go and get support in their celibate lifestyle. I felt driven to create a site where singles can go and meet other like minded singles to help support them on their celibate journey.
Give us a little background information about yourself.
Growing up I always wanted to wait until I was married to have sex, but I lost my virginity at the age of 18. As a result of my choice, I was disappointed in myself and the outcome of the relationship. On the search for love and not knowing what true love was, I entered quite a few sexual relationships that I consciously and subconsciously didn’t want to enter. I was always very open to abstaining from sex, but when actual talks came about I had very few willing partners. When I was 25, I remember feeling very empty and unfulfilled on the inside, I started praying to God for a wife and asking him to bless the marriage. Then I realized that I was going to have to do something different in order to receive his blessing. In hindsight, I wish there had been an avenue and platform such as BlackCelibacy around at the time. I feel I would have made better choices. That is part of the reason why I started BlackCelibacy.
What is it that you hope to achieve most with BlackCelibacy.com?
What I want to achieve most with BlackCelibacy, is to bring awareness to the black community that celibacy is an option and for singles to be accountable for their actions. I also want to inform and educate singles about the consequences of sex outside of marriage, and having multiple sexual partners. My hope is for BlackCelibacy to be the place where singles can go and meet other like minded singles without the pressures of sex, and connect with others who support their lifestyle. I believe that with this environment, it will dispel some of the antiquated notions about celibacy. I would like to reach Celibate Singles and Singles considering celibacy by giving them options and resources that we have available to support their celibate lifestyle.
Who has been your biggest inspiration?
My biggest inspiration is my mother. Growing up she was academically gifted, but came from a very adverse background. She gave birth to me at the age of 16. She was very determined and she obtained an advanced degree in her early twenties. She always led by example and until this day she is one of the few people I can truly count on.
If you could get on TV and you had one sentence to deliver a powerful message to the American people, what would that sentence be?
Your life is not defined by the choices you made in the past; it’s the choices you are making today.
If you could get one celebrity to endorse your site who would that celebrity be and why?
There have been many celebrities to come forward being transparent about their celibacy: such as Meagan Good and Devon Franklin, Lenny Kravitz, Tamera Mowry and many others. While I can appreciate their transparency about their celibate walk, I would choose whomever God reveals to me.
What would you say to someone who’s thinking of becoming celibate?
Practicing celibacy is a wonderful thing. It shows your strength, individuality, and respect for yourself and God. When we get out of line with God’s will, we sometimes suffer the consequences. There has never been a society or culture that has ever benefited from premarital sex. We see the social ills in our community on a daily bases. With over 70 percent of black kids born out of wedlock, HIV/Aids, and a number of singles in committed relationships where their only bond is sex. Practicing celibacy is a wise thing to do.
What is the main advantage of being celibate?
There are lots of advantages to practicing celibacy there are 10 benefits listed on the Homepage of www.BlackCelibacy.com. The main advantage of being celibate is that you are being obedient to God. When you’re obedient and spend time with God you will have clarity which will protect you from the harsh realities that sometimes the world offers.
In today’s culture being celibate has a bit of stigma attached to it especially for young men who are often judged by how many “notches” they have in their belts, are there any words of encouragement you have for someone who may be facing scrutiny for their choice to embrace celibacy?
Your circle of friends is a powerful thing and not everyone belongs in your circle. My suggestion for you is to surround yourselves with people with high morals and values. When you are in the wrong circle, it is almost impossible to reach your purpose and destiny. You have to do what is best for you spiritually and what is safe for you physically. It is an unfortunate reality that sometimes we are taught incorrectly through a generational cycle of ignorance. Social sites such as Facebook and Twitter have dozens of advocates for celibacy that you can connect with and you can also visit our online book store and purchase books that will educate and inspire you. We just want you to know the life you live is determined by the choices you make. We at BlackCelibacy.com want you to know that we are committed in supportting you in your journey.
What’s in the future for BlackCelibacy.com?
I’m excited about the future for BlackCelibacy.com. We have lots of exciting and innovative ideas that is going to make BlackCelibacy a premier dating site for healthy black relationships. We are becoming more active in the community, and we are now starting to advertise. BlackCelibacy is a new dating site with more singles that are joining daily and we are now attracting people as far away as Africa and Australia. While we want to see membership increase, what matters most is our visibility and how effective the message we send to empower singles and let them know that they can be successful on their celibate journey.