If your boyfriend recently decided to leave you all alone on your love boat and swim to the shore all by himself, then chances are you’re still clinging on to that lifesaver vest without knowing whether to let go or not.
Sure, the pain is excruciating, you might be experiencing some feelings you never thought existed, your heart might be literally aching… And it’s been only one day!
Your knight in shiny armor who swept you off your feet and took you all the way to ecstasy, just brutally knocked you in the head with a paddle and swam so fast that even Michael Phelps would have been jealous…
Pull yourself together girl!
Take a deep breath, here’s how to get over a breakup fast.
Step 1: Fight through your initial grief.
Euripides used to say “Waste not fresh tears over old griefs.” In other words, stop with all the crying.
Do you want to negatively impact your health for the long term?
Seriously, it’s a proven fact that a lot of serious diseases such as ulcers, migraines, and cancer have deep psychological roots and can be caused by long bouts of stress and intense grief.
The evidence is clear: Feeling depressed and stressed all the time are never going to do your health any good.
Prolonging heartbreak by reliving your love story and its brutal ending will only harm you physically and psychologically.
Just think about this, your appetite is probably already severely affected by the whole breakup. By this time, you’re either eating too much, or you’re fasting like the Pope. You’ll either become obese or anorexic; it’s one way or the other.
So the first step in getting over a break up is conquering the initial sadness and fear of never being able to get over your ex.
You can do it, and you can even find the real love of your life, just bare with me for a moment.
Let’s move on to the next step you’ll need to take to get over a breakup… This is a very critical step… In fact, it may be the most important.
Step 2: Remember the ugly stuff.
You want to know how to get over a breakup fast? Well, for starters don’t gloss over the negative aspects of the relationship and your exes personality.
Most people going through a recent break up tend to solely focus on the best part of the relationship, but that’s a very flawed way of thinking if you want to get over your ex fast.
It’s human nature to want to hold on to the good stuff, but the ugly stuff needs to reach the surface NOW. That is if you want to get over your breakup soon.
You need to understand that having amnesia when it comes to the actual causes of your breakup – whether you were the “source” of the breakup, or he was – will never do you any good. You will only remain in the dark, fooling yourself into thinking you lost the best man you will ever find.
Instead, do a memory exercise and relive all those times when he yelled at you for no reason, when he – God forbid – hit you, when he cheated on you, when he flirted with the waitress at Red Lobster. When he forgot it was your birthday or anniversary, when he drank too much and got into a fight, when he forgot to show you any shred of affection for weeks and the list can probably go on and on forever.
Let’s face it, nobody is perfect. And now is not the time to start thinking that your ex was. He wasn’t perfect, and in your mind, you need to put a spotlight on his flaws if you want to get over the break up fast.
Step 3: Live in the moment.
We all have a tendency to cling to the past, especially when we suffer a loss.
I want you to remember this, though. Everything happens for a reason.
You might think your ex was the love of your life or your soul mate, but if that were true, your breakup likely wouldn’t have happened.
So start asking yourself why did you choose to place him so high on a pedestal in the first place? It’s time to initiate his “comeback” to Earth, where he belongs.
It’s time to begin moving on and leaving him in the past where he belongs.
So get out of bed in the morning and go to sleep at night embracing the new life and all the opportunities you’ve been blessed with.
Life has endless opportunity for happiness, joy, and true love. So never live in the past, embrace the present, welcome the future, and enjoy your life.
Step 4: Start treating yourself like the Queen you are.
Relationships involve two people. Well, three or maybe four if your ex was a cheater.
Regardless of that, it’s still hard to find a mate that shares your interest and fulfills all of your needs and desires.
Simply put, it’s hard to find someone that treats you like the Queen you are. So I doubt your ex lived up to the standards you deserved.
Well, it’s time to start living your life and putting yourself on a pedestal.
Go to the movies, go hang out with your girls. Pamper yourself, enjoy your freedom. Treat yourself how he should have treated you. You deserve it.
It’s always best to complete the puzzle left after a breakup by focusing on yourself, your happiness, and your own needs and desires in life.
Love yourself and forget about having to be his “Perfect woman,” cooking his meals and attending to his needs, It’s all about YOU now!
This will undoubtedly help you recover from your break up quickly.
Step 5: Pull your head out of the sand and reorganize your life.
Don’t live with the wrong impression your life is a total mess now that you’re single again.
You still have the ability to love, provide for yourself, and find real happiness.
You have nothing to fear about being single.
You can continue to live your life as before, but even better and without restrictions.
You don’t have to cook for two, you don’t have to worry about adding too much salt to the meals or overcooking them every once in a while, you can order takeout whenever you don’t feel like cooking, and you can do pretty much whatever you want… Whenever you want.
You can even go back to college and get an advanced degree if this is what you always wanted, no one is there to object to the decisions you make that you feel will improve your life.
Reclaim your power and live your life.
Step 6: Be smart and avoid him.
How to get over a breakup fast?
Well, for starters stay away from your ex.
That means avoiding mutual hangouts, places you used to frequent together, and mutual friends that might bring him up at least until you’re over him.
I mean, you don’t want to hear about his new victim girlfriend, or bump into them when you’re out right?
So do yourself a favor and take precautions to avoid bumping into or hearing about him.
Step 7: Take karate lessons.
Well, it’s not mandatory to learn how to fight or go somewhere with the motives of striking a punching bag, but it sure is fun and helpful for relieving stress and tension.
You can easily lesson the impact of the anger and despair caused your break up by hitting the gym and working out a few times a week.
Exercise has been proven to relax the mind, body, and release stress. It will also get you looking at your best when you re-enter the dating scene…
Which leads me to my final tip on how to get over a breakup fast…
Step 8 – Start dating again.
First thing first, make sure that you are really ready both emotionally and psychologically to start dating again by checking out this 5 point checklist:
If after reading the above you determine that you are ready to start dating again then don’t hesitate.
Go shopping, get your makeup and hair done and go out to meet some new people.
Whether it’s at a nightclub, a bar, or some other social function, if you’re dressed to impress you’re likely to meet all sorts of new people. You might even find them interesting and intriguing.
Enjoy being at the center of attention. You’re single, you’re young, you’re sexy. The ball is in your court, and you can be as picky as you want to be.
So don’t fall into the arms of the first guy that walks towards you; don’t be afraid to shop around and engage in a little casual date.
It might be hard in the beginning, but this is a surefire way to get over your breakup fast.
Remember ladies: As hard as it may seem now, it’s never impossible to get over a breakup and you will undoubtedly come out of the darkness stronger and smarter if you stay focused on self-improvement.
When it comes to getting over a breakup fast, the first thing you have to do is find your inner strength.
That’s what a lot of the tips above boil down to.
Take life as it is, enjoy your every moment of your newfound freedom, learn to really love and accept yourself.
Don’t rush love. Wait until you have found the real thing and realize you’ll never find your one true love without suffering a few heartbreaks here and there. It’s just life.
Make sure you follow all of these steps or at least most of them.
The tips above are undeniably very powerful keys to getting over a breakup fast.