I’ve been thinking of getting back with my son’s father for at least two months. We’ve been broken up for six months, but he is the one man I’ve been with since I was 16. He cheated and has an outside child. I’ve hated him for it and amplified every situation until neither of us could take it. Now he won’t take my calls or texts and never sees his son. Any advice?
Question answered By BlackLoveAdvice.com staff writer Quentin Witt.
Sometimes it is best to leave the past in the past. You have been with this man since you were 16, so you feel attached to him, and might be having a hard time adjusting to life without him, but all evidence indicates that he has moved on. He has an outside child. He doesn’t answer your phone calls or text. I’m sorry, but it appears he has moved past your relationship, and eventually you will to.
My biggest concern is his lack of contact with his child. No matter how he feels about you, he should still make an active commitment to be in his child’s life, that should be your primary concern, how having a absentee father can impact your child’s life for many years to come.
Statistics show that:
- 71% of all high school dropouts come from fatherless homes. (9 times the average)
- 85% of all youths in prison come from fatherless homes. (20 times the average)
- 40.4% of young adults in prison are black.
- 85% of teenagers involved in gang activity and youth violence are fatherless.
It’s time to call a truce and learn to co-parent, if you two are meant to be together, in time things will work out, and it will happen, there’s no need to force love. But, in all honesty, you can do much better than a man that will cheat on you and get another woman pregnant, then treat you as if you are the one that destroyed the relationship.
Find a new man that will have more love and respect for you. However, before you do that, find your child’s father and make an attempt to get him involved in his son’s life.
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