Too little, too soon? More like too much, too soon. When it comes to dating, being able to identify the early signs of abnormal romantic behavior can help you avoid a lot of headaches, in some cases, it could even save your life.
Dangerously, obsessive men who thrive off of controlling women, there are many of them out there, but you don’t have to fall victim. They can easily be spotted if you look out for a few early warning signs.
Let’s start with this seemingly innocent early warning sign that your new man might fall dangerously in love with you…
Sign #1: He has no friends.
Or, he is the type you would call socially isolated. You notice he rarely goes out with friends, he’s always alone when you see him, and never receives calls or text messages when you’re around.
Healthy people usually have a friends network, even if its just one or two people. If he appears to have no social connections be alert. Once you become the center of his social universe, no telling how far he will go to keep you.
Sign #2: He always over-interprets the things you say.
This guy over analyzes every word that comes out of your mouth, and he does the same with every small gesture you make. He spends all of his time carefully studying your personality, and he creates scenarios in his head about the things you actually mean to say, as opposed to what you actually said.
He is clearly hearing what he wants to hear. This is a sign of romantic delusion, and could also indicate borderline schizophrenia.
Take this relationship no further. Get out now.
Sign #3: He tries to seclude you from family and friends.
This is a huge red flag. If a man begins to try to cut you off from family and friends, you should really question his motives. Chances are he’s trying to eliminate any outside influence that might question his behavior, the way he conducts himself in the relationship, or crazy rules he wants you to obey.
Sign #4: He wants you to quit your job.
This is another sneaky tactic these types of men use. He tries to convince you to quit your job because, “He can take care of you,” or he “doesn’t want his woman working.” The reality is that this is a tactic to make you dependent on him financially, which gives him, even more, control over your life and hinders your ability to leave him.
Fact: Most women brought into emergency rooms due to domestic violence lack financial resources and are socially isolated.
Sign #5: He Doesn’t want you going out alone.
He might have told you plainly that he doesn’t like you going out by yourself. However, the more likely scenario is his actions are revealing his true feelings. When you go out, he always tries to tag along, or….
Sign #6: When you are out by yourself he constantly calls and texts you.
Your phone has become a digital leash. He’s always calling or texting asking where you’re at, who you’re with, how long until you get home. And more frightening, if you don’t respond to one of these calls or text messages, you know there will be a huge argument the moment you see him.
Sign #7: He has been violent towards you in the past.
This is entirely unacceptable, and an indication that he views you as a possession that he can do to as he pleases. He is definitely dangerously in love with you. This isn’t the type of love you want, do yourself a favor and end the relationship before thing’s spiral out of control. Which brings me to my next sign…
Sign #8: He has threatened to harm himself if you leave him.
If you have ever attempted to break up with him, and he has threatened to hurt himself, you are dealing with a very unstable individual who needs psychological counseling. Any person that has so little self-value that they would harm themselves because of the loss of a girlfriend is very dangerous, not only to himself but others. It’s not cute. It’s not a show of devotion. It is an alarming sign of what is yet to come. Do not go back. Don’t answer his phone calls. Don’t let him know where you are moving to. Buy protection.
If you notice some or all of these signs in a man you are dating be forewarned, this is a very combustible relationship. This isn’t love, this is a dangerous obsession. Don’t fool yourself, things will not get better. They will only get worse. Get out now before there’s no turning back.