8 Music Videos That Sabotaged Black Relationships

8 Music Videos That Sabotaged Black Relationships

Posted by in Black Love Advice

Music is very powerful. The lyrics to your favorite song can influence you without you even realizing it.

When you’re able to put a visual image in the form of a video to go with your favorite song, music can be even more powerful. So many people out there will disagree with me by saying things like, “That’s for weak-minded people,” or “It’s just entertainment.”

The moment you get to talking about the power of music and the influences it has on people of all walks of life, you get accused of being a would-be censor or radically anti-secular. The truth is, enough happens in real life to prove that music and the videos released to depict the messages of songs have an effect on people.

An article published on our site last week showed how music can effect our romantic emotions in a positive way. Freedom of speech advocates will quickly take credit when an example of positive news comes from the direct influence of music or videos.

However, when an example of negative news is in the spotlight and music’s influence is portrayed in a bad way, no one wants to claim responsibility. On a real note, people who truly understand how to aggressively market songs and their videos for the purpose of making record sales know better.

These people know that it’s all about mind control. It’s all about getting people hypnotized into the lifestyle and mind state of the people and images that the music portrays.

The subliminal messages containing sexually suggestive material are sent intentionally. An honest, big-time music marketing executive will tell you this is true.

Anyhow, this site has a message too but it’s not subliminal. We’re all about overtly discussing how to restore black love. We’re about giving useful information that explains what can be done to build up a relationship. In this article though, we’re going to do something different.

My awesome content manager gave me a topic that was very interesting. I was given the great opportunity to write about eight popular songs and their music videos. However, these songs and videos contained visuals and messages, that in my opinion, had a negative impact on black relationships. Here is the list I came up with:

8. TLC- “No Scrubs”

While any well-meaning and productive woman has the right to desire a man with something to bring to the table, it’s easy to cross the line and be looked at as a gold digger. This song almost crosses that line. The video is creative and it only features my favorite old-school trio of divas doing what they did best.

But the message in the song can be picked apart in many ways. Sometimes, us ladies will want a “baller type” and actually slide him the digits when he approaches. We give him our everything just because he has money to spend. Then after he gets the nookie, he  drops us like a bad habit.

It doesn’t matter if you’re  an A-list diva or the Jane next door, a guy with a lot of money can play you faster than a broke guy can play himself. Don’t fall for the hype.

7. Sporty Thieves- “No Pigeons”

I was in high school when this song came out. It was the male response to the TLC mega hit that was number eight on my list. These guys were one hit wonders but the raps they fired off in their verses were some major blows during that era’s battle of the sexes. The music video was actually hilarious at times.

After school one day, “No Pigeons” was blasting out of a car that contained four guys. The driver did donuts and was acting a fool in the school’s student parking lot. The four boys put on a show after they heard three girls sitting in a car playing “No Scrubs” on the car’s radio.

The girls then got confrontational and an argument ensued between one of them and one of the boys in the other car that was burning rubber. The girl ended up getting slapped in the face and the police were called. I witnessed firsthand how music can negatively influence and effect young people.

6. Mokenstef- “He’s Mine”

This song and video contain a message that teaches young women to be tolerant. But the thing they want women to tolerate is not good. In this video, group members of the performing R&B trio sing the words to this song as an all too common cinematic event unfolds in another scene.

You see a handsome, well-chiseled man putting his clothes back on looking in the mirror at the house of a woman he’s having a one night stand with. This very same man literally runs back home to his woman (depicted by the group’s lead singer) and jumps into her waiting arms like nothing ever happened.

Okay, so maybe you stay after he does it for the first time. But what about when he does it over and over again? Will you still be singing, “He’s mine, you may have had him once but I got him all the time.”

5. Aaliyah- “If Your Girl Only Knew”

Aaliyah was definitely my favorite R&B female solo artist during her time. This song and video of hers exposes the philandering man’s worst fear: His woman finding out he was trying to hook up with a woman on the side. This song was the side chick’s anthem before this current glorified movement of side chicks we have today even existed.

4. The Dream f. Jeezy- “I Luv Your Girl”

This video and song outlines a bold scenario that is detrimental to a faithful relationship. The video is actually a remix to the original song. Jeezy’s appearance brings some street appeal but his verse has little to do with the main topic of the song.

But The Dream’s intention is to pull your girlfriend right in your face at the club! With lyrics like, “Kelly told ya’ll don’t bring ’em to the club/The way she rock that gotcha boy in love.”

The Dream know he needed to quit with this one. You trying to get these crazy women’s butts beat when they get home from the club…smh

3. 2 Chainz f. Kanye West-“Birthday Song”

This song and video represent a message that showcases female objectification at it’s finest. In the beginning of the video, there’s a scene with what appears to be a naked vixen laying on her stomach at the top of a table.

She’s inside a house at a birthday party in the scene. You can’t see her skin because she is covered in white frosting and cake decorations.

All harmless fun, right? Not to me necessarily. When some men (even the ones who are faithful) see this kind of savage objectification of women being carried out by rich, influential rappers, they silently want a part of that wild, groupie-banging life for themselves.

2. Ludacris- “P**y Poppin”

This song’s video is another exhibition of non-stop female hyper-sexualization. As a matter of fact, the video was shot right inside a strip club. Some women will actually do whatever they have to do in order to be “down with their man” even if it means letting him go to Magic City with his boys every week.

However, as this video shows, liquor and lust can test another L-word: Loyalty. What might your man do when he’s away with his boys in a scene like that? Could he handle chugging a liter of Hennessy to himself like Ludacris when surrounded by a sea of women wearing next to nothing?

1. Nelly- “Tip Drill”

Number one on this list is a video featuring Mr. Haynes aka “Mr. Country Grammar.” Now don’t get me wrong, I have always LOVED me some Nelly. His catchy dance tunes and abundance of sex appeal has made him a favorite of the ladies since he hit the music scene around 15 years ago.

However, his role of a good boy was somewhat tarnished after the release of this music video. The public outcry came in the form of a protest by the young ladies at Spellman College.

They REFUSED to allow Nelly to visit their alma mater and canceled the event featuring his appearance. The young ladies did this even though the event was a positive function involving a drive to find a donor for Nelly’s sister who was dying of leukemia at the time. When a woman’s fed up…..

I hope you enjoyed reading my take on this countdown. Expect more informative opinion pieces like this one. We’ll be discussing in the future how music and culture effect black male/female relationships at God bless you!

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